Getting Old

I haven't written here in over two weeks, and for that I apologize. There really hasn't been much going on, to be honest with you. When nothing happens in my life, I don't write anything. It's really as simple as that. I'd rather not become repetitive in writing about doing laundry again or cleaning the cat box again or anything else like that.

Daisy's headlights were fixed quickly; both bulbs had blown out at the same time, and she had a bad fuse somewhere that they replaced as well (free of charge, I might add). Both bulbs blowing out at once isn't unheard of, but it is uncommon. After a two-hour auto shop experience, we came home and everything's been running fine ever since. Daisy takes care of her car; the week before that she had an oil change and had all of her filters replaced at another shop here in town she likes to go to. I, however, am more of the "as long as the car's running and nothing's broken, fuck it" sort of person -- at least when it comes to the Monte Carlo, anyway. As long as the Monte Carlo starts up and gets me from point A to point B and back? Fuck it. It's too much money to get any of the comparably minor issues it has worked on or fixed.

I have taken my car out several times as of late, by the way, for short shopping trips -- at least twice down to the Walmart a few miles from the house, the other about five or six miles across town. Seems to be running as per the usual. Dad reminded me that it's good to do this so that the seals don't dry up and the like, which he's right about. I still haven't put gas in the car since the drive up here back in May because I don't use it enough to warrant letting a full tank of gas just sit there in it in the parking lot. I will have to fill it, however, sometime in the near future as I'll need gas to get to and from work once my job starts.

Speaking of that job, I have a little more than a week left of relative "vacation" before it starts. While that sounds like it's a long time, of course, it really isn't -- it will be gone very quickly. There are several things I'd like to do or get done before I have to start working five days a week, but I don't know if I'll be able to. For example, I'd like to watch as much of Mad Men as I can, because who knows when I'll have the chance to watch it once I start working, and I'm only at the beginning of the third season. There are about four movies either in theaters now or movies that will be in theaters between now and the day I start my job, and seeing as we haven't gone out to see a movie since before we were married (I believe the last one we saw was Mr. Peabody and Sherman), and they're movies I really want to see, I want to do that as well. I also have to figure out how to get to and from the main offices of said new job, as the training/orientation session I have to go to on the first day is in that place and not where I'll be working. According to Daisy, that's where they do all of the processing (it's where I went for my interview, but it's not like I can remember how to get there and back now), and the training itself will take place in the building I'll end up working in. This was confirmed to me a few days ago when I got an email containing my itinerary and schedule for that first day, as well as the employee rulebook, information on pay and the dress code, and forms I need to sign, print, and bring with me that morning.

There are other things, of course. We need to reorganize and clean the house, run our new steam cleaner over the spots that need to be cleaned, go through our clothing and other mixed belongings to sort out stuff to donate to charity, etc.

Mind you, I donated a ton of stuff to charity before I moved up here from Kansas, but upon moving in and unpacking things, I've found that there's simply not room for a whole lot of the stuff I did bring with me -- especially stuff I boxed up and packed well over a year before moving out. This is partially because there's not as much storage space here in our apartment, and partially because I'm living with another human again who has her own stuff as well (obviously). There's not even half the cupboard/pantry space here as there was in my house in Kansas, for example -- so a good chunk of my glassware and dishes, which we now have no room for, have to be donated. The same goes for a lot of the stuff Daisy brought over here from her old bedroom at the parents', and for a lot of our excess clothing that we now no longer have room for.

I did reorganize and clean the spare room (where this computer is) enough to allow the cats back into it without having to worry about them getting into anything, and in doing so was able to go through the rest of the wedding presents, make note of who got us what (if it wasn't written down before) and put said presents to use or put them away for Daisy to use later. The bridal shower gifts are (still) right where they've been for months in the dining room, and I (still) don't know what's in them.

As for the rest of things going on? There hasn't been much to report. For a few days last week, Daisy was sick; she's recovered now, but she doesn't know if it was the flu or otherwise. I've remained immune to whatever sickened her, so I'm not sure either. This tends to happen a lot, honestly -- no matter how sick Daisy has gotten (a handful of times since we've been together), even when I've been around her and in close quarters with her during visits and the like before the wedding, I've never gotten sick. Either I am immune to Daisy's illnesses or she isn't a "carrier," so to speak -- meaning she'll get sick herself, but won't transmit the illness to others. It's the first time she's been sick in a year or so. I had stomach issues a few days ago, but nothing else -- save for the low-grade off-and-on sinus infection that I'm sure has been caused by allergies this summer. Nebraska is a completely new environment for me and I'm sure it'll take me the better part of a year, maybe longer, before my allergies get used to it. In the meantime I've been taking decongestants and Zyrtec, and both seem to help.

One of the detriments of moving to Nebraska, however, is that I'm out of contact with a lot of people. More so than before, even. Now, mind you, even when I lived in Kansas I wasn't an especially social person -- during the summers (unless I was teaching) I became a super-hermit because I had no money, which meant I couldn't afford to go anywhere or do anything. During the semesters I was less of a hermit, yes, as I was teaching and/or taking classes, which required me to be on campus a lot and be social with a lot of friends and colleagues...but I've noticed that since I've gotten married it's almost like a switch has been flipped, and many close friends are no longer in contact with me at all. Part of that, I'm sure, can be chalked up to it being summer still and even more of it can be attributed to most of said friends graduating and going back to their homes to start their professional lives, but not all of it. I'd need both hands, or more, to count the number of friends I have who have almost (or completely) dropped off the radar since I got married and moved up here in May. I consider this unusual just because of the timing of it all -- some of them I was in contact with up to the wedding itself...and then they just disappeared. More disturbing is the fact that several of them RSVPed to the wedding and said they wouldn't miss it for the world, and then never showed up and never told me/us or talked to me/us at all afterwards. That is strange to me.

Look, I realize that people have their own lives and problems, of course, and sometimes people just go antisocial or under-the-radar for a long time. I do it myself on occasion, as you probably know. And, to their merit, I do have some friends who live far away now who made sure to send us a card or a gift for the wedding even though we're not in contact much anymore, and I appreciate them more than words can say. But this isn't about that, it's about my own isolation more than anything else.

As I've written here before, I am very isolated in Nebraska -- possibly more so than anywhere else I've lived. Yes, I have Daisy and her family, and a small handful of her friends who I've gotten to know over the course of the past two years or so, but the common running theme there is that they're her friends. Not mine. They know me through her, and many of them are very nice, but it's not like I could call any of them up and say "Hey, this is a cool city, let's go out and do something" one night while Daisy was at work without it being extremely awkward and/or a major social faux pas on my account. I don't have my own friends here. The closest thing I have to a friend of my own is Rae's boyfriend, who I've barely talked to and have only met twice. It would be extremely awkward for me to ask him to go do something. He'd probably wonder if I was hitting on him.

Truth be told, I know next to no one in this town. Obviously that will change eventually, but right now I feel more like a hermit than I have in years. Daisy goes out four days a week (because, ahem, she works) and I'm lucky if I leave the house once -- usually for a visit to the parents' and/or for shopping. I'd go out more if I knew my way around the town or had the motivation to do it solo, but I just don't. And what would I do anyway? I don't even like to go shopping without Daisy by my side unless I absolutely have to and it can't wait. I'm also a really boring, nerdy person -- going out to do something, especially alone, just seems like a colossal (and usually expensive) waste of time.

Daisy has told me that she wants us to go out and celebrate my getting the job before I start working, including a dinner at a place of my choice and a movie. The movie part we already covered -- we went to see Guardians of the Galaxy on Monday night. I'm not even sure I really want us to spend the money going out to dinner somewhere -- we have enough food in the house to eat, and she's continually exhausted now with her work schedule, which sometimes requires her to work several hours of overtime every morning, depending on how busy it is. She can do that, of course, and is basically required to do that when necessary, since she's now no longer an hourly employee after her official promotion. During my training, at least, I'll be working 8-5. My schedule changes after that. At least that's what I've been told, anyhow. Instead of going out I'd much rather just spend some quiet downtime with her here at home while we can still get it. Once I start my training, for those two weeks I will see her for approximately an hour per day and only one weekend day, Sunday.

In this next week, though, there are still errands that need to be run in the meantime; I have to get a new phone, for one, which is something I've been putting off ever since moving up here and finding that my T-Mobile phone has no service in 90% of the city. Not just "low bars," no. Zero service whatsoever. Like it's in a complete and total dead zone. She has Sprint, and I'll probably get a phone on her plan. I don't really even care what it is (though I'd like an iPhone), and I really don't care if I have to get a new number or not, because it's not like anyone calls me anyhow. I'd almost rather get a new number, actually.

I sprained or pulled my arm muscles somehow during the day today; how, of course, I have no idea. It feels similar to how I tore my muscle when I was moving a few months ago, but I haven't done anything particularly strenuous. It didn't really start bothering me until I vacuumed the house tonight -- back and forth motion pushing/pulling the vacuum doesn't really feel that great when you have, apparently, a pulled muscle. It's in the upper arm, front of the upper arm, and the front of my shoulder. So, basically, almost exactly the same as the other arm injury, just on the other arm.

I'm getting too old for normal movement, apparently. I've pulled muscles in my sleep before, as I'm sure many of you have, but I was fine when I got up this morning, so I have no clue why I suddenly have this muscle-pulled, aching arm. Daisy became worried about me when I told her about it, telling me "please don't die from a heart attack."

"Um...that would be pain in the left arm, neck, and jaw," I told her. "This is my right arm, and it's just a pulled muscle, babe."

Daisy is fiercely protective and always incredibly concerned for me when I mention that I don't feel well or that I'm in pain. While it is appreciated and very sweet of her, I mean, I have lived almost 32 years on this planet without dying yet from minor pains.

So...yeah. That's where things are right now. Life continues on as normal; I spend my days either sleeping or doing (quiet) household chores while Daisy sleeps, and spend my nights (when she's at work, at least) much the same way. I'm just trying to somewhat enjoy my last days of relative freedom before I am once more back to the grind of a daily job -- even if it's a daily job that's much different than anything I've done before. The fact that it's going to pay me a hell of a lot more than I've ever made before also helps lessen the dread of starting there -- or working again in general, really. You know me. I'm a lazy sloth of a person by nature, but when there's a job to do, I do it.