Unpackaged

Days until Christmas: six
Days until birthday: one

I got up early this morning. I spent the entire afternoon in the living room, within earshot of the driveway and the street, waiting on the mailman. I read three issues of Playboy I was unable to read during the semester cover-to-cover, and read a graphic novel as well. I made a pot of coffee thanks to my new, eight-dollar coffee pot I keep in the kitchen, and drank three cups of it with creamer.

I paced the living room, getting up to look out the window every time I heard a vehicle in the street, hoping it was the mailman. I did this for more than three hours.

Why did I do this, you might ask? Because the huge box from my parents was supposed to arrive today, and in it would be something new, something different, to eat. It's also the only birthday/Christmas gifts I'll probably receive, and one of the few things I'm looking forward to over the entire break I'll be off and at home.

Truth be told, I've had to seriously ration my food because until after January 6, I won't be able to afford to go shopping. I'm also out of the vast majority of even the basic elements of cooking, including butter, sugar, flour, salt, most vegetables, all meats, and am almost out of cooking oil as well. I also never keep milk or eggs in the house, because I don't use them. What I do have is dry popcorn, several packages of dry pasta (and one can of sauce), a few cans of mixed vegetables, some ramen, and a few cans of Progresso soup.

As well as gallons of soup I cooked over the course of the semester and froze for later eating. I cannot tell you folks how sick I am of eating soup over and over again. Last night I made spaghetti and garlic bread for dinner, which was a little different (and used the very last of my margarine, so now I'm out of that too), and I have that as leftovers, but still.

Anyway.

The weather has been either torrential, freezing downpours or torrential, freezing downpours with the occasional thunderstorm all day long. It's the front edge of the winter storm that's moving in tonight, and it's a storm that will more than likely switch over to ice and snow soon. This morning, shortly after I got up, I moved the Monte Carlo into the garage to get it out of that stuff. In the garage it will remain until I leave the house again and/or until the nastiness of the weather clears up. As of right now, it's 5:30PM and the line between rain and ice, ice and snow is inching ever closer to Newton. But I digress -- this post is supposed to be about the box.

So I paced the living room and waited for hours. Usually, on most days, the mailman arrives anytime between 1PM and 3PM. For as spotty and unreliable as our mail service is sometimes, that's become the norm for my street. Sometimes it's a little earlier, sometimes it's later, but it's usually somewhere within that two hour window.

3PM came and went. Nothing. I knew he hadn't been here because the neighbors had their flag up on their own mailbox.

4PM came and went. Still nothing. I was beginning to get more impatient.

4:30PM came and went. WTF, mailman? I know it's rainy and cold, and that it's the last week before Christmas, but really?

Finally, at 4:45PM, I saw the mailman come down the street. I put on my slippers, bundled up tightly in my robe (for I knew I'd have to sign for the package or otherwise confirm that it was me receiving it), and went downstairs and outside, standing outside my downstairs door where my car would normally be parked.

He pulled up to my mailbox, dropped off two items (which turned out to be a magazine and another reminder/bill from Geico to pay my car insurance)...and kept on driving to the next house.

No box. No cards, either birthday or Christmas, that may contain money. Nothing but those two things.

Son of a bitch, I thought. I just wasted my entire afternoon for nothing, and now I'll have to do it again tomorrow as well. Son of a bitch.

I was not happy. The box is shipping slower than expected, apparently, for the post office told my parents that I should get it today. It's a minor quibble, of course, a first-world problem, but it still irritates me. I was looking forward to eating something different tonight -- whether that be my mother's chex mix or ordering a pizza with whatever cash anyone else mailed me in birthday/Christmas cards (because that tends to happen, at least sometimes). My friend Zedral offered to order me a pizza last night, but I declined; I can order pizza myself if I want to -- I have a ton of points from Papa John's that'll let me get free pizzas, even -- I just don't have any cash whatsoever to tip the delivery driver. And believe me, in this weather, they'd definitely deserve a good tip. Besides, Zedral is just as poor as I am; she doesn't need to be spending money on me. No one does, really; times are tough for just about everyone I know this year.

So it looks like I'll have to wait at least another day on the box. Even worse is that the mailman tomorrow may be even later, depending on how much snow we get here in Newton. Wichita is supposed to get maybe an inch or two at the most, but Newton is right on the line where we could get smacked by the snowy part of the storm before it departs the area. It's so close that even the weathermen can't accurately predict how much we'll get up here. We just have to wait and see, I suppose.

As for the Geico bill I did receive in the mail today, that's no longer an issue -- I paid my car insurance online last night, just as I did the first time around. At least Geico's online system is fast and secure. The money was out of my bank account ten minutes after I paid the bill, and let me tell you...that hurts. It hurts a lot. Let's just say I am desperate to get my next paycheck this week and that it couldn't come soon enough, especially as I'm half-starving myself and I still have my rent to pay. I hate bills and financial obligations so, so much. I can't tell you how much.

At least the cats have enough food and litter to last them a while. This is good, because according to my calculations, I'll have about $100 total to my name at the end of this month. Yes, total. As in, I desperately need that student loan to drop ASAP after the new year, and will be waiting in great anticipation for my January 6 paycheck.

One at a time, ladies. Want to come to my house for a candlelit dinner of ramen and tap water?

Yeah, it's a sad state of affairs right now.

Of course, the weather hitting means that I'm not going out for my credit-card-fueled "birthday dinner" that I'd planned. I say "credit-card-fueled" because that would've been the only way I could've paid for food that's not already in my home. When I saw the weather this morning, and have continually watched it roll in and get progressively colder/wetter/nastier all day today is when I put my car in the garage and resigned myself to staying in. I don't care how quiet/lonely/hungry I am here in the house, it's not worth going out in that shit to spend $10 on a meal from some fast-food place, more than likely.

Nothing else is going on, really. Like I said, it's really quiet here. I don't think I've ever wanted the holidays to come and go so quickly as I want them to this year.