Though this is probably not breaking news to most of you at this point, I wanted to come here to mention that the girlfriend and I broke up this afternoon, after more than six years of being together.
Before all of you flip your collective lids, let me state that it wasn't a hate-filled, yelling-and-throwing-shit breakup, and that both of us are fine. It was a very quiet, civil discussion, where we decided that it would be better for us to go our separate ways rather than be (mostly) unhappy as a couple. Our relationship, as they say, had run its course. There's no ill will or animosity involved, and neither of us are devastated or crying our eyes out or anything like that. We'll still remain friends for the foreseeable future -- we're just no longer together.
This will probably come as a shock to a lot of you, but as a whole over the past year, both of us have been growing apart more and more, and we knew it was coming down the line eventually, even if neither of us wanted to vocalize that fact. Neither of us have been truly happy in the relationship for a while, and after a certain point a little voice starts asking you what are we doing here? what's the end result going to be? When one can no longer answer that question is when the leaves blow away, figuratively speaking, and decisions have to be made. Both of us had become increasingly unhappy with the situation in recent weeks and months -- not angry-unhappy (for the most part, anyway) but just dissatisfied more than anything else, her more so than me, and when that happens it's just time to let things go.
Truthfully, I have nothing but the highest respect for the girl; the six years we were together completely changed my life -- I moved from West Virginia to Missouri, and then to Kansas, because of her, and if it weren't for her I more than likely would not be in graduate school right now, bettering my life and continuing my education. She has made me, overall, a better human being. Despite any fights and grievances we had over the course of our relationship, she was a much better woman than I ever deserved to have (especially since most of those fights and grievances tended to be my fault anyhow) -- and, of course, I wish her nothing but the best out of life. None of you who know her should harbor any ill will towards her for our breakup.
With any breakup of a long-term relationship in which the couple has lived together, there will have to be some arrangements made, of course. She's moving to Wichita to be closer to the school, and I'll be staying here in Newton for the foreseeable future. She's leaving me most of the furniture -- which is exceedingly nice of her -- as she will have no use or space for it, and is looking at different apartments and complexes down in Wichita to find somewhere to live so that she can move out sooner rather than later, even though I told her she doesn't have to rush through things. I will be keeping at least two of the cats, Petey and Sadie, though she yet doesn't know if she's going to take Maggie (read: her cat) with her because she's not sure she wants to separate her from the other two. When September rolls around, I'll have to redo the lease here at my place to remove her from it, as well as redo the security deposit once she gets the original deposit back. More than likely I'll just have to write her a check for the amount of the security deposit, so that no money actually has to change hands with the landlord. I will also have to change the name on our cable account from her name to mine. We're waiting to do most of the clerical stuff, obviously, until we get paid and/or my student loan disburses, which should be in a few weeks, so that in the case that I have to completely renew the lease, it won't cripple my bank account.
So yeah, that's about it. There isn't much else to say, really. As I've said, don't worry about me, though your thoughts and concerns up to this point are and have been greatly appreciated. We had a good run, all things must come to an end, etc. Life goes on; I will still continue this blog (in its new format, now) as usual, my book will still be edited and published, and I'm confident that my now former girlfriend will continue to excel in her own life, as always. Things change; we all move on in life in our own ways. The two of us are just doing it now as single people.
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